Plot: Based on the graphic novel (isn't everything nowadays?) by Scott Mitchell Rosenberg, Cowboys and Aliens takes place in the 1873 Arizona territory. When outlaw Jake Lonergan (Daniel Craig) wakes up in the desert with a strange metallic device on his wrist and absolutely no clue how he go there, Jake tries to unravel what exactly happened to him. Along the way Jake aligns with the mysterious Ella Swesnson (Olivia Wilde) and confronts the rich and powerful cattleman Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde (Harrison Ford). Beside a ragtag team of followers from the town of Absolution, this group must stand up against a dangerous alien threat before they take over the entire planet.
Review: Despite the fact that the title sounds laughable you'd think that with quality actors like Craig, Ford, Wilde, Sam Rockwell, Paul Dano, and Keith Carradine and a script from LOST co-creator Damon Lindelof, that Cowboys and Aliens somehow might succeed.
Unfortunately director John Favreau's latest film is as ludicrous as the title.
Let's begin with the "plot." Although the story starts out somewhat plausible, with Jake riding into the town of Absolution, subduing Dolarhyde's drunk son, and then being thrown in jail for previously stealing his gold, the film then degenerates into a schlock fest of epic proportions. The attack on Absolution is reminiscent of Independence Day though not as exciting. The aliens kidnap some of the townsfolk, including Dolarhyde's son Percy (Paul Dano) for the cliched reason of experiments. The reason for the experiments is never revealed. Also the aliens have apparently come to Earth to steal its gold. Intergalactic leprechauns. Yeah that makes sense.
Inexplicably the townsfolk think they are being attacked by demons. Listen I understand that it is 1873 but since when do demons attack with giant metal vehicles? Furthermore, in a contrived bit of plot stupidity Jake suddenly remembers where the aliens' hideout is when the group is taken prisoner by Apache Indians and he ingests mescaline. Really?
Jon Favreau's film is shoddy at best with choppy pacing and sloppy editing that makes me wonder how this could be the same director that brought us Elf and Iron Man. The scenes that are cowboy/western-centric are pretty well done, especially the encounter between Jake and his former gang. Unfortunately, the alien story makes the film awkward and confusing. Favreau has a difficult time deciding what he wants Cowboys and Aliens to be. Maybe that's because these are two different genres and they should stay that way. The fact that there were five screenwriters who developed this mess probably contributed to the problem as well. Cowboys and Aliens feels like the writers threw darts at a wall with various ideas on it, through it in a Slap Chop, and hoped that what came out was a good film. Unlike the Slap-Chop where the inventor says "you're gonna love my nuts" you're not going to even like this movie.
Thankfully, Daniel Craig saves the movie from being completely unwatchable. His portrayal of outlaw Jake Lonergan was one of the highlights of the film. I only hope he's in a real western someday. Sadly Oliva Wilde's character of Ella is completely transparent you can see her secret from a mile away. As for Harrison Ford. Poor poor Harrison. That you would stoop so low as to be in this film either means you need the money or you've lost all artistic integrity. His portrayal of Dolarhyde is more vacuous than Kim Kardashian's personality. Ford comes across as a one dimensional gruff character whose only function in the film is to be surly. The days of movies like The Fugitive are long in the past. At least Roger Guyett from ILM did a decent job with the visual effects and Harry Gregson-Williams' score was passable.
The best I can say for Cowboys and Aliens is that it wasn't as bad as Transformers: Dark of the Moon.
My rating: 4/10
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